Jeb's Jobs Plan Fails to Get Marco Rubio Back to Work

LAST UPDATED @ 2:40PM (11.1.2015)

WASHINGTON (The Nil Admirari) - Today, Republican presidential candidate and former Governor of Florida Jeb Bush was widely criticized for his latest jobs plan failing to get presidential rival Senator Marco Rubio (R-FL) back to work after missing a growing number of votes in the Senate. Bush's plan was declared "a complete failure" by conservative and liberal observers alike for its exclusive reliance on guilt, and failure to give Rubio any incentives to get back to work.

"There is no incentive for me to go back to the United States Senate and do some work, because I get paid either way. This whole guilt trip thing by Jeb isn't changing anything," stated Rubio, who was participating in a pie eating contest in Iowa.

Marco Rubio (right) and Jeb Bush look at each other at 3rd GOP debate.
REUTERS/Rick Wilking

Rubio added, "If he can't get me back to work, Americans should rightfully be concerned about Jeb's ability to get any of them back to work. This is just another example of Jeb's underwhelming presidential campaign."

"Marco needs to go back to work, and that is that. The people of Florida did not elect him to defeat me in the presidential election," stated a flushed Jeb Bush. "How am I the one who is on the defensive here?"

An unidentified member of the press reportedly heard Bush state he "had better, more awesome and fun things to do to than run for president" under his breath.

Rubio suggested Bush should "seriously consider" doing those other "better, more awesome and fun things to do."


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