Hillary: First Woman President Worth Death of Middle Class

LAST UPDATED @ 6:30PM (11.15.2015)

WASHINGTON (The Nil Admirari) - Today, Democratic presidential candidate and former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton told Americans electing the United States' first female president was worth the final collapse and permanent extinction of the American middle class. Clinton urged Americans to not be sexist, and to vote for her instead of trying to prevent both their standard of living and wages from continuing their free fall courtesy of the very people bankrolling her presidential campaign.

"I think it is pretty sexist for Americans not to elect me president just because I am going to allow the middle class to disappear forever, let wages and the average American's standard of living to fall even further, and make my rich donors on Wall Street even more wealthy," stated Secretary Clinton, who called her chief Democratic rival Senator Bernie Sanders of Vermont "King Sexist" for opposing her.

Clinton added, "It is painfully clear to me the biggest sexist in America is that horrible Bernie Sanders, who keeps focusing on issues like rising income inequality that a large majority of Americans are deeply concerned about. Seriously, Americans just need to drop their silly, sexist, and sentimental attachment to the middle class and vote for me."

Hillary Clinton testifying before House Select Committee on Benghazi. (Above)
(Public Domain Image)

"Come on..." said Clinton, who sounded as if she was begging. "Wouldn't it be fun if the United States finally had its first woman president, regardless of her warmongering ways, domestic policy positions that favor the powerful and super wealthy, and whether or not a clear majority of the American people can stand looking at, or listening to, her?"

"The answer is 'yes,' of course," explained Clinton, who explained she would continue urging American women to vote for her simply because she is totally a woman just like them, except her husband former President Bill Clinton signed a law that destroyed banking regulation in 1999 and she is owned by Wall Street and the military-industrial complex.

"This election, it is time for Americans to stop being selfish by voting for the candidate they deem to be in their own best interest, which is clearly Bernie Sanders this time around, so that they can vote for me instead and continue descending into hopeless poverty," declared a stern Clinton.

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Secretary Clinton allowed the press to ask her questions, but only replied to them if the reporters asking questions called her "President Clinton."


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