9.28.2017

Trump to Hit Puerto Rico with Category 5 Ignorance, Insensitivity

LAST UPDATED @  10:16 (9.28.2017)

"This is the last thing Puerto Rico needs," said Governor Ricardo Rossell√≥ in reference to Hurricane Donald, which is expected to make landfall in Puerto Rico on Tuesday, October 3rd.




SAN JUAN, PUERTO RICO (The Nil Admirari) - Hurricane Donald was reportedly closing in on Puerto Rico and projected to make landfall on Tuesday the White House confirmed. The storm is yet another disaster for the already storm-ravaged island and is expected to unleash Category 5 ignorance and insensitivity the entire time it is in Puerto Rico.

"This is the last thing Puerto Rico needs," said Puerto Rico Governor Ricardo Rosselló. "We just got hit by two storms and Donald's visit definitely won't help the people of Puerto Rico recover any faster."


Rosselló added, "I am also positive Donald Trump did not actually know Puerto Ricans were American citizens until a couple of days ago. You know, when we finally started receiving aid."

"He knew Puerto Ricans were citizens and that Puerto Rico has been an American territory since.. for...  along time," explained White House Press Secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders.


Mr. Trump deflected TNA's questions about Puerto Rico and used one reply repeatedly.

"Did you know Puerto Ricans are Americans... I did. I always did," said Trump.

DISCLAIMER NOTICE:

The Nil Admirari is "America's Most Swell News Source" of the spurious variety.