"Unbelievable" and "Shocking" Used without Irony to Describe Latest American Mass Shooting

 LAST UPDATED @ 4:20PM (6.12.2016)

A number of Americans and media outlets were somehow shocked and unable to believe there was another mass shooting in the United States.

2016 Orlando Nightclub shooting | Wikipedia
The scene of the latest American mass shooting. (Above)

ORLANDO, FLORIDA (The Nil Admirari) - Today, a number of Americans and corporate news outlets were not intentionally being sarcastic when they described the latest mass shooting in the United States as "unbelievable" and "shocking."

"This is unbelievable. This kind of thing never happens in the United States," said Mandy Hammer, who awoke this morning from a coma she had been in for over fifty years.

The corporate media in the United States routinely used the word "shocking" to characterize yet another mass shooting in America, which boasted a historic body count.

Maxwell Keene, a Harvard University English professor, told TNA he was unaware of changes to the English language that would make either word appropriate to use.

A press release by the National Rifle Association informed Americans more guns would fix the epidemic of gun violence in America.

Congress confirmed any meaningful gun control remained hopelessly out of reach.​


The Nil Admirari is "America's Most Swell News Source" of the spurious variety.