3.19.2016

Protesters at Trump Rallies to Be Wrapped in "Trump Safety Flags"

LAST UPDATED @ 11:52AM (3.19.2016)

Donald Trump promises protesters at his presidential campaign rallies will be wrapped in "Trump Safety Flags," which gives them his personal promise of protection from his supporters.

A "Trump Safety Flag," which Trump protesters will be draped in
to place them under the protection of Donald Trump. (Above)

WASHINGTON (The Nil Admirari) - Earlier today, Republican presidential frontrunner and xenophobia-enthusiast Donald Trump announced protesters at his campaign rallies would be wrapped in "Trump Safety Flags" for their protection. The billionaire declared once a protester was shrouded in a Trump Safety Flag he or she received immunity from being harmed by his loose cannon supporters.


"Protesters at my rallies will be wrapped in 'Trump Safety Flags.' These flags give them my personal promise of protection from my enthusiastic supporters, and a guarantee they will be escorted out of my rallies unharmed," explained Trump.


Trump continued, "And, to show there are no hard feelings, every protester will get to keep the Trump Safety Flag they are wrapped in."


"It's a wonderful present from me to all of those who hate me and crash my rallies," said Trump to a cheering crowd.


An unidentified member of the press asked Trump what his inspiration for the safety flag was.


"It just sort of came to me while reading a book of Hilter's speeches," replied Trump.

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