"All the American people need to know is now is the time to invest. Ignore all the distractions out there like the recent Chinese stock market crash, the fact corporations are using their profits to purchase more of their own stock to greatly overvalue it, and the collapsing commodity market," urged the statement from Wall Street, which did not reveal its author.
The seal of the Federal Reserve System, a non-governmental
private bank that may cause the next economic collapse. (Above)
"Stocks are going to keep rising and never go down in value thanks to trickle-down economics. The market certainly won't come down in a crash-like manner due to all of those distractions out there. So invest in already-inflated stocks to show those fat cats who have been doing all the inflating that you are no fool," declared the Wall Street statement.
No one on Wall Street would take credit for the statement, but virtually everyone on Wall Street asserted they "definitely have no idea" who wrote the small legal print in the document's footer declaring they "were not legally responsible for massive investor losses due to deceptive - but legal - trade practices."