8.02.2015

Trump Fires Staffer for Making Racist Statements Similar to Those He Makes Daily

WASHINGTON (The Nil Admirari) - The campaign of Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump announced today it fired an adviser named Sam Nunberg for making racist statements shockingly similar to those Trump makes every day. Nunberg was fired after it was discovered he made offensive Trump-like statements on social media in 2007 and 2008. Nunberg denied he ever stated them, much like Trump would in his position.

"You know, whoever this Nunberg guy is, he is way too much like me. And if there is one thing America doesn't need it is another Donald Trump spouting racist statements like it's going out of style, even though the scared old white people totally eat it up," stated Trump, who directed the black members of the press to the back of the room prior to the start of the press conference.

Donald Trump speaking at the 2015 CPAC in Maryland on 2.27.2015. 
(Photo: Gage Skidmore)

Trump added, "I don't even think this guy was a part of my campaign, but a bunch of other people who say they work for me keep telling me was. So I fired him just to be sure. But I am nearly 100% positive he was not working for me, because racists don't work for me. I have enough racist sentiments for everyone."

Nunberg allegedly called President Obama popular conservative "insults," such as "Muslim" and "Kenyan." He also called the president a nonsensical string of words he thought sounded good, namely, “Socialist Marxist Islamo Fascist Nazi Appeaser."

Republicans praised Trump's decision to fire his racist adviser, because they believed it proved to everybody else he was "totally not a racist now."

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