8.13.2015

GOP Offers to Fly Dick Cheney, George W. Bush to Hague If It Can Arrest Hillary

WASHINGTON (The Nil Admirari) - Earlier today, the Republican Party offered to fly former Vice President Dick Cheney and former President George W. Bush to the Hague so they could go before the International Criminal Court (ICC) to face war crimes charges related to their illegal March 2003 invasion - and subsequent occupation - of Iraq. Republican National Committee Chairman Reince Priebus stated the only thing the GOP wanted in return from the Democratic Party was to have Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Clinton arrested for "a bunch of things."

"The Republican Party will surrender Dick Cheney and George W. Bush to the ICC to face war crimes charges for their actions in Iraq. All it asks for in return is to have Hillary Clinton arrested. Heck, we'll put Cheney and Bush on a plane right now," explained Reince Priebus.

Dick Cheney
Cheney speaks at Camp Anaconda, Iraq in 2008. Credit: Magnus Manske

Priebus added, "House Republicans are currently participating in the thirteenth hearing on Benghazi, as all the others exonerated Hillary. The investigation of her e-mail use as Secretary of State is going to last forever. So let's just make a deal."

Democratic National Committee Chairman Debbie Wasserman Schultz said the offer "was a little tempting," but she had contacted Hillary, who asked, "You called me for what?" and was not in favor of the deal.

Neither Cheney or Bush were available for comment, as Cheney was in an undisclosed location and Bush was painting a portrait of himself riding an atomic bomb.

Just over 69% of Americans offered to pay for a one-way trip for Dick Cheney and George W. Bush to face war crimes charges before the ICC if the deal didn't happen.

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