5.08.2015

GOP Presidential Debates to Ban Evolution, Climate Change, Age of the Earth

WASHINGTON, D.C. (The Nil Admirari) - The Republican National Committee (RNC) announced today it was banning certain "divisive subjects" from being discussed during the 2016 GOP presidential debates. The subjects at the top of the list include evolution, man-made climate change, and the age of the Earth.

"The American people don't want to get caught up in distractions like how old a presidential candidate thinks the Earth is or whether a candidate buys into evolution," stated Chairman of the Republican National Committee Reince Priebus. 

Chairman Priebus added, "Americans want us to talk about real policy issues like jobs, and increasing military spending while cutting the size of government, and more jobs."

Priebus at the Western Republican Leadership Conference in October 2011.
(Photo: Gage Skidmore)

Priebus promised other serious issues would be on the table in lieu of what he deemed as the "icky sciency ones."

"Our presidential candidates will continue to wage a social war we have already lost against gay marriage during the forty debates we have scheduled. And there is little doubt all of our candidates will be playing up the freedom every American should have to die due to inability to afford health insurance," pledged Priebus.

The RNC has also strongly discouraged the press from asking Republican presidential candidates any of the banned debate topics while on the campaign trail.

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